Chapter 3 of the in Untitled Action/Adventure/Mystery/Comedy/Romantic/ Story
“I plan on making you into a villain sandwich and will spread a little common sense on the bread. “
“Mmmmm”. Maybe that wasn’t funny enough.” I found that one on the Internet somewhere. It was kinna a cool night and I had just finished getting some jokes off the Internet and was watching some show on TV. I had also started to practice my comedy routine. I decided to take a break and read a Father Brown book. Father Brown helped me to gain some insight on how to fight crime as well as giving me some tips on how to fight the evil within my own soul. It was about 8:15 .I wonder if anything exciting is happening around town. I could travel around the pond and go to Sneakers. There was always some activity happening around there. But I I was relaxing after a hard week of putting a dent in the crime origination known as TKO. Our big battle consisted in a Huge Pie Fight at Chuck E Cheese. Too long to explain. I was resting in my little house down by Pattlewoddle pond in Biggsville, about to have a can of Jolt Cola when I heard laughing.
“Ha Ha Ha”, It was the secret FunnyPhone. Gosh No Rest for Justice. I’m a crime fighter in case you happen to be one fruit loop shy of a full bowl. I AM FUNNYMAN. The Clown of Crime Fighting. I picked up the Secret Funnyphone, which was hidden in an old Grover doll, answering, “Funnyman, if your’ in trouble I’ll Laugh your Problems away.”
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!” came from the phone. Yup! Certain celebrity's have crazed girls follow them around, Leonard Nimoy has certain nerds follow him around, and I had Sarah. Sarah was a rich ditz. Some gang of thugs walked into her house one time and just walked out with her expensive jewels. I mean literally. And she’s like. “Ohhhh”. We actually dated at one point. We broke up, obviously. I just wasn’t into meditation and she wasn’t into being alive. Ha. A Steven Wright Joke. Anyway, Sarah seemed to always call me about something. The last time had been when she thought a bird had been kidnapped from the local pet store. What would she want me to waste my time with this time.
“What I asked”?
“Ja Ja Jaso”... Sara started to say. Thinking I knew what person she was trying to say. I blurted out,
“The Charm Machine”?
“Has Kris.. and is’... Kristin was my girlfr...Um a friend who happens to be a girl. She was a reporter for the Biggsville Tribune. It sounded as if The Charm Machine had his paws on my would be girl, I mean Friend. If one villain got my teakettle boiling it was him.
“Where” I asked, wondering where she was.
“Camp Me”....
“Say no more I’m on my... “
“Wait I want to come”! The last thing I need on a dangerous mission in which I hope to end up romantic is a tag along annoying ex-girlfriend who will just whine when I ask her to do anything that might help me.
“ Sorry Sarah, it’s too dangerous and..AAAAAAAAAAAAA” I dropped the phone and covered my ears as an ear piercing noise shot through my brain....” Nooooooo, Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa”. I dropped to me knees in pain. The noise, is
To be explained in the next chapter.
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